Finding Calm in the Holiday Rush

If you have ever seen The Goldbergs, you know Beverly Goldberg does not do the holidays halfway. She is the mom who needs matching outfits, themed photos, and enough food to feed a small army. As she once declared, “If we don’t take this holiday photo, our entire year was for nothing!” (Admit it! You’ve said something similar during the holidays.)

It is hilarious on TV. But in real life, most of us know that feeling. The season of joy somehow turns into the season of demands. And half of them are self-imposed while the other half is piled on by everyone else.

Under Pressure

The pressure of the holidays is not just in our heads. Research shows it ramps up in our bodies too. A 2021 study in Frontiers in Psychology found that when people practiced savoring small positive moments during stressful seasons, they reported higher well-being and lower stress. Translation: joy is more about attention than perfection.

One of my mindfulness coaching clients discovered this last December. She had a full plate. All the usual things like shopping, family obligations, and work deadlines stacked on top of each other. By the time the big day came, she felt more depleted than joyful. So, we created a practice to shake things up and bring some fun back into the mix.

Try This: The Joy Hunt

For one day, become a detective on the lookout for unexpected joy. Not the picture-perfect moments, but the real ones. The crooked ornament on the tree. The dog knocking into wrapping paper. The cashier wearing reindeer antlers without a hint of embarrassment. Each time you spot one, pause just long enough to smile, laugh, or snap a quick picture. By the end of the day, you will have proof that joy is not missing. It is scattered everywhere, waiting to be collected.

Closing Thought

The holidays do not have to be a marathon of doing. They can be a season of noticing and playing. Our work this month is to loosen the grip of perfection and remember that joy comes from the messy, human, ordinary moments.

Beverly Goldberg might insist the perfect holiday photo makes or breaks the year, but mindfulness reminds us it is the imperfect ones that make the best memories.

“How we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives.” — Annie Dillard